It seems like every time we read the news LGBTQ+ rights are under attack someplace. Yet, we always hear wonderful stories from queer people about how amazing the country, state, city, town, neighborhood, or cabin in the woods where they live really is.
This year’s IHS reading challenge will focus on books set in different parts of the world. We think it’s vital to show that sapphic people not only exist but are everywhere.
We also want to hear from authors and readers about where they live. If you’d like to share your experiences, click here for the interview form.
Today, Mickey Brent is here to tell us about Brussels, Belgium.
Where in the world will you be taking us today?
Brussels, Belgium
Tell us in one sentence what’s so special about living in this place.
Brussels is a friendly, vibrant, multicultural city and everyone I know speaks at least three languages fluently.
How long have you lived there? Or, if you no longer live in this place, how long were you there and when did you leave?
I’ve lived here since 1991 (except for a fourteen-year period when I was living in Japan and the USA).
What is/was it like being a sapphic (or LGBTQ+) person living in this place?
It’s hard to generalize because everyone’s experience is unique. I suppose it depends on whether you live in the city center, or in a more rural region of Belgium. In Brussels, my experience has been great. The city center is very gay-friendly. Luckily, I haven’t been treated differently because I am an LGBTQIA+ person. My colleagues at work, along with friends and acquaintances treat me as a whole person. It doesn’t matter whether I’m straight or not. Nobody bats an eye when I mention that my partner is a woman. Nowadays, most people seem very inclusive towards our queer community.
I’ve noticed that attitudes in Brussels have changed over time, however. In the mid-90s, I was on a women’s volleyball team and one evening, after a game, a teammate said some hurtful things to me in the locker room. I had just come out to the team, and her comments really stung. Until then, we had gotten along well as teammates. I still remember her words. Hopefully, she’s changed her attitude about the queer community by now, to match the views of most of us living in Brussels.
What about living in this place gives you hope?
People living in Brussels are generally friendly. In my neighborhood, they often say “Bonjour” or “Goedemorgen” to strangers in the street. Brussels is a bilingual city, where most people speak both French and Dutch (Flemish). To demonstrate our willingness to accept others, most of us switch from one language to another, depending on whom we’re speaking with. And if someone sees a tourist who appears lost in the street, they will often ask them if they need help (in French, Dutch, or English). They’re not too busy to stop and assist strangers. Brussels isn’t an impersonal place like other major cosmopolitan cities. It’s a large, friendly village, which I find refreshing.
What gives me hope is that I feel a real sense of community here that I don’t always feel in other parts of the world. People truly care about each other. They may not show their feelings right away, especially when you come from another country. In fact, it took me a while to make good friends in Brussels. (That’s why I joined the volleyball team!). But the friends I’ve made here are real friends—for life. We listen to each other, we support each other, and we care about each other. This amount of consideration and empathy for others gives me hope for the future of humanity.
Are there any challenges to living in this place, either as a queer person or more generally?
There is a certain linguistic challenge, which people visiting Brussels aren’t always aware of. The fact that we have three official languages in Belgium (French, Dutch and German) makes it difficult for foreigners looking for work. Not only do you need a residency permit, and a valid work permit, but most jobs outside the EU Institutions in Brussels (and some international organizations such as NATO) require that you speak at least three languages fluently (and two of these are usually French and Dutch). So, even though I was fluent in English, French, and Spanish when I first moved here, I absolutely had to learn Dutch (Flemish). It’s not an easy language to learn, especially since every region in Flanders (the northern part of Belgium) seems to have its own distinctive dialect.
Thankfully, being queer doesn’t seem to make much of a difference, at least in my case. But I feel there is still work to do in the context of DEIB (diversity, equity, inclusion and belonging). Although the government has made great efforts for increased cultural integration and education since the early 90s, some areas in Brussels remain culturally segregated. With such a large mixture of residents from the 27 countries representing the European Union, along with the diverse religions, cultures, ethnicities and languages of many immigrants living in Brussels, integration is not an easy task. Unfortunately, some people, especially those from the earlier generations, don’t make conscious efforts to try to understand the lifestyles of people from other cultures who live in their neighborhoods. This happens all over the world and I wish it weren’t the case.
For someone who has never been there, what’s the one thing that they must see or do if visiting your area?
You can’t visit Brussels without seeing the Grand-Place (Grote Markt). I used to work next to this magnificent public square. I’d stroll through it twice a day, passing crowds of tourists, their mouths gaping in awe of its beauty. Over the years, I ended up taking pictures of plenty of tourists, since I speak Japanese and often offered to snap photos of them. With its cobblestones and ancient buildings with gold trim, the Grand-Place is one of the most stunning places to visit in Europe. In the summer, if it’s not raining, you can enjoy a delicious Belgian beer or two at one of the many outdoor cafés. Plus, there are plenty of chocolate shops where you can buy amazing Belgian pralines (chocolates). And the city often stages free music festivals there, such as the Brussels Jazz Festival, featuring world-renowned musicians. What more could you ask for?
What’s the one type of regional food and/or drink they absolutely must try?
I already mentioned our delicious pralines (chocolates) and beer. In fact, there are over 1,500 types of Belgian beer—some originally brewed by Catholic monks, called Trappists. Many people prefer drinking blond beers in summer, and the darker ones in winter. They’re strong, sometimes sweet, and always tasty. To go with your beer, you must try frites (frietjes in Flemish), with mayonnaise, or one of the dozens of original sauces proposed by the frietkot (place that sells French fries).
You will then eat the fries, served in a paper cone (a cornet) or a barquette with little plastic forks, not your fingers!
You might be surprised if you order a “steak americain” or “americain préparé” in Belgium. Like the French “steak tartare,” it’s a dish made of raw meat (beef), mixed with capers, spices, mayonnaise, and other ingredients. I’ve never tried it, but many people here eat this dish with frites (frietjes) or as a sandwich for lunch.
Do you have a favorite local restaurant? What makes it special?
I have too many favorite restaurants to come up with only one. All I can say is that I’ve never eaten poorly at a restaurant in Brussels. I’ve heard people say that the portions here are as large as in Germany, while our dishes are considered as gastronomic as in French cuisine.
Meet Mickey Brent (she/they)
I love to read and write (obviously) and I’m curious about what makes people tick. I love practicing all kinds of sports. That’s why the protagonists in my sapphic novels are so athletic. I love art, music, and dance. I think it’s great when people feel confident enough to be fully authentic with others. Even if it makes them seem geeky. I’m a geek myself.
I love to travel and explore new places, meet new people, and devour incredibly spicy dishes, especially when the food is grown by locals. I’m a total foodie. I also love cats. (And dogs that look like cats.) I’ve lived in lots of countries and speak quite a few languages. I’m always trying to learn about new cultures and customs… and expand my vocabulary in three languages at once. You never know when these random bits of knowledge will come in handy. Perhaps in my next novel?
Also, I’m an empathic bookworm with a quirky sense of humor. I have a strong sense of social justice. I sometimes feel awkward in social situations. I don’t care if people think it’s weird that I don’t want to wear what everyone else is wearing. I love the color orange. I’d rather not wear makeup or earrings. I prefer a comfy sweatshirt and jeans to business attire any day. I’d rather cuddle up with my cat and partner on the couch (with a good sapphic book) than attend a fancy party or gala. But if it’s a book signing—especially mine—I’ll definitely make an exception!
