Get ready to learn more about the book Learning to Love Again in this discussion with sapphic author M. E. Tudor.
Join us for an exclusive peek behind the scenes as we quiz M. E. Tudor about Learning to Love Again, writing, reading, and more.
This book is part of the Foodie Romance category in the 2024 IHS Reading Challenge.
Why did you write Learning to Love Again?
I feel that sometimes people overlook the fact that domestic violence is a part of same-sex relationships, just like in straight relationships. I felt that lesbians, in particular, are less likely to talk about being in an abusive relationship, especially if there were already issues with their friends and family about the person being gay. But I also want people to believe that you can find true love and a healthy, positive relationship after you get out of an abusive one.
Who is your favorite character in the book?
Ava is my favorite character in this story, and I relate to her in so many ways, including drinking too much to deal with stress. Like Ava, I have learned not to accept abuse and to create boundaries with friends and family. And I found my true love after being in an abusive relationship.
What inspired the idea for Learning to Love Again?
I read an article online about the number of cases of domestic violence that involve same-sex couples.
What was the biggest challenge writing this book?
The biggest challenge was not to make Ava sound too pathetic. I wanted her to be relatable but not too sad.
What part of Learning to Love Again was the most fun to write?
I loved creating the scene about Ava’s visit from the mountain lion and, of course, writing about the food they were having.
How did you come up with the title for your book?
That was easy to come up with because the story is about learning to love yourself again and finding love again.
How much research did you need to do for Learning to Love Again?
I did a lot of research about Ridgway and Ouray, Colorado. I lived there for three years, but a lot has changed since the 1990s when I lived there.
If you’re planning a sequel, can you share a tiny bit about your plans for it?
I am currently working on a second book that will have Ava and Mel as minor characters. This is another book about finding love again, but the main characters will be finding love again after the death of a spouse.
What is your favorite line from your book?
“Oh no! I think I pissed it off.”
What is your writing process like?
I’m definitely a pantser most of the time. I write as the story comes to me and I try to write it chronologically. But, I’m finding that I need to do more plotting so I’m less likely to get parts of the story confused.
Where do you usually write, and what do you need in your writing space to help you stay focused?
I usually write on a computer anywhere I can find time and have access to one. Most of the time I like to listen to music while I’m writing and I have playlists for every book I’ve written.
If you could spend a day with another popular author, whom would you choose?
I would love to sit down and have a beer with sapphic author, Gerri Hill. Her books are the best and I would love to know about her writing process and how she comes up with ideas.
What’s your favorite writing snack or drink?
I like to sip whiskey neat when I’m writing, or a cold beer.
How do you celebrate when you finish your book?
I usually take my partner out for a celebratory dinner, preferable Mexican or steak depending on the mood.
Is there a particular genre you would love to write but only under a pseudonym?
I would love to write mystery and /or thrillers under a pseudonym. I’ve been all over the place with my M. E. Tudor pen name, but I write predominantly lesbian romance and lesbian young adult under that name. I’ve learned the hard way that you have to be careful to not mix up your genres too much because your fans have certain expectations.
Do you have any odd writing quirks?
I stare off into space when I’m thinking about a scene. I have to picture it in my head before I can write it.
Do you have a pet who helps/hinders your typing?
My cat, Tate, likes to lay on top my keyboard, usually as soon as I sit down to write when I’m at home. He is very insistent about getting attention. He’s an old, short-hair cat with a mixture of black and white fir. We got him at the Humane Society when he was about six months old. He’s pretty close to sixteen years old now.
What animal or object best represents you as an author or your writing style?
I think a hound dog would best describe my writing style. When I get into a story I’m on the hunt for every tidbit of information to make the story realistic and a good read, but God forbid a squirrel, or anything else get’s in my peripheral vision because I’ll be off chasing it and then forget what I was working on.
What are three words that describe your personality?
I am a music-loving introvert. I love listening to music, but I hate dealing with people. I’d rather be by myself with music playing than hanging out with other people.
What is the most valuable piece of advice you’ve been given about writing, and by whom?
I’ve been listening to T. B. Markinson and Clare Lydon’s podcast, Lesbians Who Write, which they have sadly stopped producing for many years, and one of the things they both always say is to “just keep writing.” It has helped me keep going when things have been really tough.
What has helped or hindered you most when writing a book?
I have a LOT of family drama that never seems to end.
When you’re writing an emotional or difficult scene, how do you set the mood?
When I’m writing an emotional or difficult scene, I put myself in the character’s shoes and try to imagine what I would be feeling if I were the one experiencing what is happening.
What do you do to get inside your character’s heads?
I imagine myself being exactly where my character is at whatever point they are in their life.
If you could be mentored by a famous author (living or not), who would it be?
Patricia Cornwell
What author in your genre do you most admire, and why?
Gerri Hill is my writing hero. I love her lesbian romances. I wish I could write stories like her.
Have you ever cried when writing an emotional scene?
Oh my God, yes! I do it all the time. Partially because I’m an easy crier. I can cry over the littlest thing. I think the scene that I’ve cried the most over in one of my stories is when Natalie’s grandmother dies in my book, Through This Together.
Do you feel bad putting your characters through the wringer?
I do feel bad when I put characters through the wringer, especially when it’s something that comes out of the blue that I didn’t originally plan for the character. The best example of that is when my character Jamie in my book Suddenly messes up her leg in cheerleading practice. I didn’t see that coming until it came out of my head and onto the page.
Have you ever hated one of your characters?
I have several characters in my books that I’ve wanted people to hate. The one I hated the most was David Haverty, the minister in Standing Her Ground. He is one of those people, who I have run into, who think because they are a leader in their community that they can get by with anything.
Have you ever fallen in love with one of your characters?
I have fallen in love with PJ from my book Suddenly. She’s the good bad-girl that I always wished I could be.
What type of books do you enjoy reading the most?
I really love lesbian romances and murder mysteries. I have always loved both of these genres more than any other.
Are there any books or authors that inspired you to become a writer?
I have always wanted to be a writer. I used to love reading Johanna Lindsey’s epic romances and Patricia Cornwell’s mystery thrillers, but reading Gerri Hill’s first book, One Summer Night, made me want to write lesbian romances.
What books did you grow up reading?
I used to read all the romances I could get my hands on when I was a teenager. As an adult I became more interested in murder mysteries.
What books have you read more than once in your life?
I used to reread Johanna Lindsey’s Malory family books over and over again, but now it’s Gerri Hill’s books. I’ve read Hunter’s Way, Gulf Breeze, and Artist’s Way so many times I’m going to have to buy new copies of the paperbacks because they are worn out.
What book do you wish you had written?
I wish I wrote Twilight and made it into a sapphic retelling. I think that would be really fun.
Describe your favorite reading spot.
I love to read lying down on my bed.
Do you only read books in one genre or do you genre hop?
I typically read lesbian romances for the most part, but I do hop to murder mysteries and thrillers sometimes.
Have you ever thought you’d hate a book, but ended up loving it?
I thought I would hate reading Crime and Punishment, which was assigned as a high school English class read, but the way that Dostoevsky gets you inside the character’s head was amazing.
